Hi all,
Perhaps I find a bigger need to spread joy in my life because of my brain. I have self imposed so much pain and guilt that sometimes the best way to alleviate my own pain is to bring joy to others. So I try to do this. I show people beauty, point at little miracles and find happiness and joy where others might not. It's for me I guess, but being observant and talkative about it might help others to experience the awesome as well.
I see the moon. Even over portopotties, I can see the beauty in it. I see dragonflies and glinting sun on water, and I can't help loving it. I can't help but to exclaim to those near me about how awesome it is. This might make me an incorrigible pain in the ass. But it also means I'm living life fully, hoping others will exclaim their excitement too.
There's my thought for the day. Spread joy, happiness, and find those little miracles. They're everywhere if you look.
~Mark
Friday, August 18, 2017
Sunday, August 13, 2017
Justifiable anger?
Hi all,
Sometimes I struggle with being angry about things. I know, most of you probably do too. However, when is it ok for a mind like mine to be enraged? Lots of things set me off, but I've never been in a fight. I usually choose calm, middle of the road reactions to things, but sometimes I get really upset because people treat me poorly. Either they take me for granted, leave me out of things that matter, or do what they feel like without regard for my feelings. When this happens, is it justifiable to be angry? Should I stop feeling these feelings because my brain chemistry isn't normal? Should I endeavor to hide them or bottle them? Or is it a sign that I'm manic? Can I be mad but not unhealthy?
I think I'm partially mad this morning because our country and more specifically our president isn't dealing with the racism that is rampant in our society. I don't fucking understand why he couldn't just condemn the white supremacist rally where people died instead of saying, "but the other side did it too!" I don't think he's an out and out racist. But I do think he is disinterested in coming to the table to confront these sorts of issues, instead either blowing them off or saying that they're liberal snowflakes who have nothing to complain about. I'd imagine he's just barely smart enough to realize that that sort of statement would result in his impeachment. So instead, he dances around it. He says the people standing up to racism and bigotry are part of the problem because they're peacefully protesting. He tries to imply that if they weren't there, the asshole who hit them wouldn't have gotten mad.
But when something is wrong, is it not a justifiable, normal reaction to be angry? And what is normal, anyway? As a friend of mine's father once said, "normal ain't nothing but a setting on a dryer." If I choose apathy when things are wrong out of a fear that my demons are getting to me, I think I'm a lesser citizen and a lesser person. I have to truly feel the emotions in order to deal with them, address the situation if I can, and have the wisdom to know what I can't change (serenity prayer). There are a lot of things a privileged white male like myself can change. However, the attitude and the disrespect the president shows toward protesters and people of color isn't something that I, with all my social and political clout, can do anything about. I can rail against it in this blog, I can go to rallies and support my friends, and I can try my damndest to live my life in such a way that I am supportive in every way I can be to the ideologies that I believe in.
I guess I've now, "told you why I'm mad." Hope it's either informative or at the least not widening the divide between the alt right and us liberal snowflakes.
Have a good day,
Mark
Sometimes I struggle with being angry about things. I know, most of you probably do too. However, when is it ok for a mind like mine to be enraged? Lots of things set me off, but I've never been in a fight. I usually choose calm, middle of the road reactions to things, but sometimes I get really upset because people treat me poorly. Either they take me for granted, leave me out of things that matter, or do what they feel like without regard for my feelings. When this happens, is it justifiable to be angry? Should I stop feeling these feelings because my brain chemistry isn't normal? Should I endeavor to hide them or bottle them? Or is it a sign that I'm manic? Can I be mad but not unhealthy?
I think I'm partially mad this morning because our country and more specifically our president isn't dealing with the racism that is rampant in our society. I don't fucking understand why he couldn't just condemn the white supremacist rally where people died instead of saying, "but the other side did it too!" I don't think he's an out and out racist. But I do think he is disinterested in coming to the table to confront these sorts of issues, instead either blowing them off or saying that they're liberal snowflakes who have nothing to complain about. I'd imagine he's just barely smart enough to realize that that sort of statement would result in his impeachment. So instead, he dances around it. He says the people standing up to racism and bigotry are part of the problem because they're peacefully protesting. He tries to imply that if they weren't there, the asshole who hit them wouldn't have gotten mad.
But when something is wrong, is it not a justifiable, normal reaction to be angry? And what is normal, anyway? As a friend of mine's father once said, "normal ain't nothing but a setting on a dryer." If I choose apathy when things are wrong out of a fear that my demons are getting to me, I think I'm a lesser citizen and a lesser person. I have to truly feel the emotions in order to deal with them, address the situation if I can, and have the wisdom to know what I can't change (serenity prayer). There are a lot of things a privileged white male like myself can change. However, the attitude and the disrespect the president shows toward protesters and people of color isn't something that I, with all my social and political clout, can do anything about. I can rail against it in this blog, I can go to rallies and support my friends, and I can try my damndest to live my life in such a way that I am supportive in every way I can be to the ideologies that I believe in.
I guess I've now, "told you why I'm mad." Hope it's either informative or at the least not widening the divide between the alt right and us liberal snowflakes.
Have a good day,
Mark
Summers, afa^2
Hi all,
It's been a while, hope you've all been well. I'm realizing that summer's coming to a close and I haven't said much on the blog lately. So here goes. I find that my teaching career feeds into my mood swings with some predictability, and that summer is usually a time where I'm high. Not surprisingly, it also means increased spending, silly chicanery, more dating, adventures, and low balances at the bank. My struggle for the last few weeks of summer is as follows: Do cheap and free things that are still awesome. In fact, I want to write a social media app that helps people find things like this. It's going to be named something like AFA or A squared - always free and awesome. Maybe afaa. or Afasquared. I dunno, feel free to comment suggestions.
Anyway, the basic premise is this. There have to be others like me who are always in search of the next adventure. There also have to be others who, like me, can't afford to have all those adventures be expensive. So, Afa^2 will use social media and crowd sourcing to find the best of every area. For instance, in my neck of the woods, I think tubing the farmington is one of the best things. It's free as long as you have 2 vehicles and a couple inner tubes. It's not hard, and as long as you can swim it's a great way to spend a lazy day in the hot summer. But, unless you know the river and where to park, put in and take out, you can get lost and end up walking miles to your car. So it's only free if you have the knowledge. I know people have little gems like this for their areas that I haven't figured out yet, and I'd love to hear about them. So this app is like waze for driving, helping people avoid the pitfalls of other travelers while they do cool adventures. They could also advise that parts of the adventure are illegal, and help people do a risk assessment to see whether it's a good idea. Of course, nobody advises illegal activity, just like nobody advises people to speed when they use waze, but knowing the risks and where the cops are help people make better decisions.
It's been a while, hope you've all been well. I'm realizing that summer's coming to a close and I haven't said much on the blog lately. So here goes. I find that my teaching career feeds into my mood swings with some predictability, and that summer is usually a time where I'm high. Not surprisingly, it also means increased spending, silly chicanery, more dating, adventures, and low balances at the bank. My struggle for the last few weeks of summer is as follows: Do cheap and free things that are still awesome. In fact, I want to write a social media app that helps people find things like this. It's going to be named something like AFA or A squared - always free and awesome. Maybe afaa. or Afasquared. I dunno, feel free to comment suggestions.
Anyway, the basic premise is this. There have to be others like me who are always in search of the next adventure. There also have to be others who, like me, can't afford to have all those adventures be expensive. So, Afa^2 will use social media and crowd sourcing to find the best of every area. For instance, in my neck of the woods, I think tubing the farmington is one of the best things. It's free as long as you have 2 vehicles and a couple inner tubes. It's not hard, and as long as you can swim it's a great way to spend a lazy day in the hot summer. But, unless you know the river and where to park, put in and take out, you can get lost and end up walking miles to your car. So it's only free if you have the knowledge. I know people have little gems like this for their areas that I haven't figured out yet, and I'd love to hear about them. So this app is like waze for driving, helping people avoid the pitfalls of other travelers while they do cool adventures. They could also advise that parts of the adventure are illegal, and help people do a risk assessment to see whether it's a good idea. Of course, nobody advises illegal activity, just like nobody advises people to speed when they use waze, but knowing the risks and where the cops are help people make better decisions.
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